In the house across the street lived two delightful people… about 50 years older than me. Hopefully you are lucky enough to know older people like this… you know the ones, that prepare themselves for the outside world. They put on a full outfit often accompanied by a nice hat. Dr. Kavka was a well-respected and well-published doctor. From a resume perspective, he was top notch!
Around this time I had been searching for higher understanding of death, dying, and souls. I had recently finished reading, Many Lives, Many Masters, by Brian L. Weiss and The Education of the Oversoul 7 by Jane Roberts. The concept that was weighing heavy on me is that life in our current body is for the purpose for our soul to reach one purposeful learning. I struggled with this thinking of Dr. Kavka. He was well accomplished in his career, married for decades, and proud of his kids and grandkids.
While living across from the Kavka couple, I was working full time from my home office. Menash owned his own company so he was working more-than-full-time out of the house. After falling into platonic admiration of these awesome people, I gave them my number if they ever needed anything.
While we often joke about the “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” commercial, one day Dr. Kavka called because Mrs. Kavka had fallen and they weren’t able to get her up. I said I would come over. Dr. Kavka quickly requested for me to send my husband. In his absence, I marched myself over and successfully helped Mrs. Kavka to a chair. There were a couple more similar experiences over the years.
One day there was a knock on the door, Dr. Kavka asked to use my phone because his home phone line was not working. I suggested for me to first go see if I could fix it. Dr. Kavka asked if my husband was home. I marched myself over, again, and found the phone that was off the hook. As I was leaving, Dr. Kavka put his hand on my shoulder and said, you do things that I always thought of as a man’s responsibility.
Sadly, two days later he passed away. While sharing my condolences with the family, I happened to share this story with his daughter. After her total surprised reaction, she escorted me to each sibling to retell the story. I learned he raised his children the old fashion way where boys did male things and girls did female things. His sons became doctors and his daughters became teachers.
Well there it is! I had been assessing Dr. Kavka’s ‘purposeful learning’ in his career and family. But what I saw was deeper… about gender equality.
What I witnessed is our life’s learning is not about what goals we accomplish or how much we achieve, our life’s lesson is more of a thread that weaves though multiple parts of our life. It shows up throughout our years. It is not a goal to achieve truly a lesson to learn. (Now I’m balancing my desire to know what my life lesson is with not wanting to know it too soon. I like living.)
Thank you, Dr. Kavka!